Don’t Eat The Pies at Her House

So many callers seem obsessed with asses. It’s a wonder proctology specialty doctors are not more numerous, since so many are totally obsessed. Guys have called using toys of course, but when you get ones claiming they are using carrots, apples, candles, there’s no end to the possibilities of just what to stick up there. Some callers seem to think women are sticking their fists everywhere from their ass to their pussy as well. Not sure what kind of circus freaks they think we phone sex gals are and the positions we can get into, but they ask, believe me.

Some like using food and will even eat it afterwards, some kind of sick delight in using the piece of fruit or vegetable as a sex toy then eating it. One man called and said he’d used food as a sex toy, but he wasn’t the one who’d eaten it, he’d served it up to neighbors at a block barbecue! I really hope that was a fantasy and not reality, for their sake. It’s incredible what lengths a horny man will go to in satisfying he debased desires. Not even a melon or a grapefruit are safe from his perverted clutches.

Have you used anything other than a toy up your ass? Do you enjoy shocking we phone sex girls by telling us all about your many perverted experiences? We’ve likely heard it all before, but we are certainly more than willing and able to listen to you as you explain just what it is you have done to yourself. Porn has given so many men ideas that they otherwise would not have had. Seeing something on the screen will put ideas in your mind, mmmhh, that looks interesting, maybe I could try that and see how it feels. He seems to be having a good time using it. Realize if something gets stuck, it may lead to an embarrassing ER room visit, be prepared.

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Having Your Baby

Some callers like to talk about the impregnation fetish. It can be a very intimate, lovey dovey type of call. Not all girls enjoy it, but I certainly do. The idea of risky, unprotected sex that can result in a baby is very hot for many men and some women. Do you like the idea of slipping your hard cock into an ovulating woman that you just know stands a high chance of getting pregnant? Does that arouse you, to possibly even, as some callers do, get aroused by the particularly thick, sticky, stringy discharge that shows you how fertile she really is coating your cock?

That might be a bit too graphic for some callers into impregnation fetish, but some love everything to do with the woman being fertile and horny and a gooey, slippery pussy is just one of those little things that goes along with being fertile. All of that life giving sperm squirting into me to pool within my life giving loins. The passion, the love, the swimming sperm to that waiting egg. For them to be joined as one and you and I make a new life together. Doesn’t that sound hot? Are you getting turned on at such descriptions?

Impregnation fetish phone sex for some men is as close as they will ever get. They either have wives who have had all their children and will not be having any more, or girlfriends on the pill who have no intention of getting pregnant, so this fantasy is their last indulgence. Some that are already fathers will speak lovingly of the time when their wives were pregnant and they had a higher sex drive, due to all the surging hormones, and what great sex they had. It brings fond memories for many. So if you’d like to talk about knocking up some lady, there’s women here to help you.

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Let’s Have a Threesome

A threesome is usually one of men’s top sexual fantasies. I knew my boyfriend had always hinted around at having one, but I’d never found the right other woman to ask I wouldn’t be threatened by. Then one of my old college friends came to town for the weekend and I knew she’d be the perfect one to ask. I wasn’t threatened by her, and she was sexy, so I knew my boyfriend would go for her. I asked her and she was totally up for it. We’d actually had one many years before when I was a bit more adventuresome than I am now. She came over and he liked her immediately, as I thought he would.

We went to the bedroom and she began by giving him a blow job. I’d told her what a nice cock he had and she was curious to see for herself. I soon joined her and sucked on his balls while she sucked him. We ended up passing the cock back and forth between us sharing it. Then I took his dick and laid it between her ample tits and she gave him a titty fuck. I then got on the bed on all fours and he started fucking me from behind while she crawled underneath me and began to lick my pussy. She licked my clit until I just went wild.

My boyfriend then got on his back and she rode him while I sat on his face and he licked my cunt free of every drop of the cum he’d just placed there. He can always get hard again a few minutes after, so I never need to wait long for him. She bucked back and forth on his dick until she creamed on his cock and I gushed on his face. It was a fun night and I wish I hadn’t waited so long to indulge him, it was fun for all of us.

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Come Get My Ass

This caller was telling me of all his same sex random hook ups from yesteryear. The downfall of Craigslist hit so many casual sex seekers really badly, it’s where many of them found their hookup partners. He spoke lovingly of some seedy motel he and other men used to frequent and how it had large windows the men left open as they had sex looking to attract an audience or future partners to hookup with once they were finished with the current one they were fucking. He said he’d put on “dildo shows” hoping to entice ones into his room. Where he’d be practically touching the window glass with his ass while using a dildo, displaying his wares to passersby.

He proceeded to tell me of the hundreds of nameless black men he’s serviced over the last few decades and how he feels the big, black cock is superior and the thing he craves the most, unprotected is his favorite. His wife apparently knows all about this and thinks it’s just fine and dandy. So you can see how one must take a large grain of salt when you hear these sorts of tales. Perhaps it’s true, but more likely all in his mind.

Black men that did not want to do it unprotected he said he would simply hold his ass cheeks apart, opening his ass and have them jerk off their sperm into his gaping hole. Lovely image to be sure. So keeping the seedy motel curtains opening showing all of this to the gay men cruising by would no doubt lure them in so they could be next in line to defile his waiting his ass. He moved away and simply hasn’t been able to find any such appealing haunts as that one, and apparently the cops now go by there too often, looking to put a stop to such former shenanigans.

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Pillow Humper

Some men like to hump their pillows when they masturbate, they call themselves pillow humpers. One of my callers proudly calls himself a pillow humper, and he prefers it to his hand. There’s lots of ways that guys get off not using their hands, pillows just being one method. One caller I’ve watched on cam gets on his back and makes these movements that look like he’s doing stomach crunches, lifting his legs, crossing them at the knees and making sit up like motions. Odd ones could actually be able to orgasm that way, but people do different things.

Some girls begin masturbating by humping their pillows as well, balling them up and mounting them and then grinding on them or rubbing back and forth in a bucking motion. Pillows see a lot more action than just having a head rested upon them during sleep. Some men that masturbate this way have told me they double the pillow over, like a taco shell, and place their dick into the folded area and fuck that until they cum. All I can think of is the mess of the pillow and pillow case afterwards and I bet they don’t change it, they likely just flip it over and sleep with it to the bed side down.

Have you used your pillow for your masturbation needs? Has it been a good experience for you? Would you like to have a phone sex call while you are fucking your pillow? That can easily be arranged. You sleep with your pillow and it’s soft and familiar, sometimes you might not have been with a real woman in a while and fucking something like a pillow that’s soft and within arms reach can seem like a natural thing to do, you aren’t alone. Give us a call while you fuck that pillow and see how much better it can be.

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